#FF00AA

It’s so much more fun when you watch the keynote streamed live on the internet and you can make fun of the bullshit that comes out of their little corporate mouths. (The disadvantage is that you can’t fast-forward.) So this one is in mostly chronological order — sort of a delayed liveblog.

It seems like videos are a long time coming, so I guess I’ll update with links tomorrow (because everybody cares).

• Super Mario Bros. Wii: Apparently, Miyamoto just invented the fourth dimension of multiplayer, or something. I’m surprised that it’s just a regular 2D platformer, but I don’t even understand Mario culture, so I’m sure that’s a good thing.

• Wii Sports Resort: It does look like it may be more skill-oriented (which I’m not sure is such a good thing for Wii Sports). I still do not believe that they actually needed MotionPlus for most of that, unless the original wiimote really had awful tech.

• Uncharted 2: That was a good video, but I’m still confused why they felt the need to bring the Uncharted franchise to environments so reminiscent of that other PS3 exclusive, Metal Gear Solid 4. Aren’t there more than enough games in urban settings already? (This trailer is a much better sell, though.)

• Metal Gear Solid Peace Walker: The graphics look very nice for the PSP, but more importantly I’m impressed by how deliberately Kojima fucked Microsoft with his smirking emphasis on “this is a real sequel and the story’s really mine.” Now I wish I’d watched yesterday’s keynote to compare with what he actually said then.

• Agent: A Rockstar North exclusive? Sony must have put serious dough on the table… for something that doesn’t even have the GTA moniker. But 1970s espionage does sound like fun. More fun than gangsters, even (for me at least).

• Assassin’s Creed 2: That looks very pretty, and the new mechanics are rather interesting, but I’m not going to have irrational hopes about the gameplay until I see it in person.

• Final Fantasy XIII: Once again, it feels like Microsoft got played yesterday, showing stuff that had mostly been seen before while Square Enix saved the real trailer for Sony.

• Final Fantasy XIV Online: Sony has finally realized the value of exclusivity, and been liberal with the checkbook. I thought they had a chance of winning E3 by introducing good games, but they went for the jugular and quite thoroughly screwed Microsoft over.

• Sony motion control: I don’t know what to think about this, other than I’m pretty much convinced they didn’t originally intend to introduce it this year. I’m not sure it has anything over the wiimote (or at least MotionPlus), but their demo was orders of magnitude cooler than Nintendo’s ever was. The augmented reality aspect was nice, but this is probably going to turn into a gimmick extending the PS Eye, whereas I feel Microsoft’s Natal is somehow more versatile and could bring more significant advancements to gaming.

• ModNation Racers: Nice design and good tech (the track editor is just amazing); it’s too bad I’m not a Mario Kart kind of guy.

• The Last Guardian: Uh, I expected it to look more… different. I don’t know about you, but I’m wishing very hard I hadn’t seen the leaked video before; the final trailer would have had much more of an impact — and I’m afraid liked the beast’s design (and, possibly, its sound, I’m not sure) better in the preliminary render.

• Gran Turismo 5: Ah, they’re not dead yet, and they haven’t been twiddling their thumbs all this time, either. The game looks even more gorgeous than Prologue, and it includes Nascar (yuk) and rally cars. Considering that they’ve got Blu-Ray and I’m under the impression they’re known for making meaty games (so it shouldn’t be just a couple token rally races) I think I might need a PS3. I remembered earlier today that the PlayStation also has so much better wheel controllers than the 360 (or does it).

• God of War 3: Oh… my… God. I wasn’t convinced by anything that had been shown before, because it looked too staged and cinematic; turns out that GoW 3 just happens to be the most cinematic game ever. Amazing, and such a perfectly fitting evolution to the very first game’s fixed cameras. (And I love how it looks like the start menu integrates with your current checkpoint.)

• I need need need a PS3.

Away from the press conferences…

• Avatar: I appreciate Cameron’s commitment to making sure the licensed game isn’t a drag, and accept that Ubisoft is capable of releasing good games. But what’s worrying me — and not just regarding the game — is that I don’t see anything interesting about the universe as it is described (beyond the colorful animals) that would justify how much time he devoted to the production of this movie.

• Tony Hawk: Ride: When I saw pictures of the board controller I thought it was a completely stupid gimmick, but I didn’t realize you could actually spin it around — that makes it potentially quite cool (for people interested in those games). You can thank EA for giving Activision incentive to innovate.

• Red Steel 2: The MotionPlus gameplay could work, and it’s hard too tell with the video compression but the visual style seems to be be well realized as well. The Wii is definitely made for cel-shading.

And coming back to…

• Project Natal: having watched a live gameplay video, I think it has potential to, if not revolutionize videogaming, at least replace the Wii as the obligatory party-game console that you fire up to make your friends look stupid in front of the TV. Implemented correctly, the technology is certainly capable of being more immersive than the Wii. And more dangerous, too (to your muscles, your TV and your friends around you).

• Milo: it strikes me that this game addresses Molyneux’s very personal drive to raise a virtual child, and the game would be much less creepy, and more approachable, if you had a choice to make the character a fluffy white bunny or a fierce dragon. Or an EyePet.